Hope and Greenwood

 H&G have teamed up with Anorak to create an enormous Bunny Trunk of Easter sweets worth £150.00!
To enter the competition just hop along to;
http://www.anorakonline.co.uk/

A short Hope and Greenwood film about cakes, magic and excess sherry.

A little film about naughty, sugar mice and our recipe book Life is Sweet.

We are taking a jaunt through town on our way to building a Pop-Up Sweet Shop for Stella McCartney. As we weave through the white knuckle ride that is central London Mr. Greenwood is fantasising about excessive force, which makes a change from excessive breasts.

‘Bazooka, Exocet, Surface to Air, Glock 17, Oozy 9 mm,’ he snarls at a teenaged drug dealer in a blacked-out Fiat Punto, ‘rocket propelled grenade launcher, something big that explodes heads.’

Trafalgar Square whizzes by, lions incumbent with tourists. Lower Regent Street’s chicane snakes north.

‘I bet you would have a Smith and Wesson pearl handled girl-gun’ he bellows.

‘A balloon whisk,’ I retort brightly, clinging onto the dash board.

‘What,’ he brays incredulously, ‘beat them until stiff?’

If you are following my blog you will know that I am rather fond of Katie Price. She has balls almost as magnificent as mine.

It was a splendid moment, therefore, chez Greenwood when Mr G spotted Katie on da telly surrounded by Selfridges bags (and wearing a co-ordinating yellow track suit) with no less than four Hope and Greenwood Tuck Shop Jars in her pile of Christmas gifts. And more exciting still when she wiggled a jar to camera and proclaimed, ‘These sweets look lovely, I’m going to eat them all!’

From: Ruby  ruby@yahoo.co.uk]
Sent: 14 March 2011 19:57
To: Miss Hope
Subject: ConfectionERY Alphabet

Dear Miss Hope

I love Hope and Greenwood and thought you would like to see my Hope and Greenwood Alphabet.

I’ll have you know that it’s Me that created it (I like beginning Me with a capital letter, it makes Me sound special).

The H & G Alphabet!

A = Awfully Delicious

B = British at its Best

C = ConfectionEry (nobody seems to spell it right)

D = Dirty Dishes from making chocolate…

E = Elephant (the managing directors loyal friend)

F = Funbags of Fabulous Sweeties!

G = Gummy Bears!

H = Huge Hampers (*licking lips*)

I = I’m not sure about this one…

J = JELLIES!!!

K = Kitty Hope - Our boss

L = Lost in LollyLand…

M = Chocolate cookies - Mmmm…

N = Nougat - My teacher’s favorite

O = Old Fashioned - We love that stuff

P = Practically Perfect in every way

Q = Queens Afternoon tea

R = Rose Buds - one of my favorites (you thought I was going to do Ruby didn’t you?)

S = Sherbet Fountains! (I love liquorice)

T = Terrific Toffees!

U = Your famous fancy underwear…

V = Vanilla fudge!!! My fave!

W = Warm Sunday cocoa - mmmm…

X = Xylophones… er… chocolate ones?

Y = Yoyo’s - the old 1960’s toy

Z = Zebras they remind me of humbugs…

Lots of Love,

Ruby (aged 10)

Today is special, very special indeed, yes today Miss Hope’s Chocolate Box is revealed to the world.

Let the celebration begin! May jousters joust, trumpets sound and jesters jest. May merry ladies in pointy hats prance about with unicorns and Errol Flynn swing by on a Hollywood vine for I, Miss Hope, your favourite funny confectioner, have written a new book full of raunchy anecdotes, silly people, long words, quips, witticisms, a few full stops and an occasional recipe for something chocolaty, with calories, guaranteed to widen your thighs sufficiently enough to prevent entry into Top Shop.

It’s doing rather well I’m told. Sainsbury’s Book of the month, Campest Recipe Book 2011 by the gay wing of Wormwood Scrubs and Best Door Wedge – Men Heart Hammers Monthly.

So go and buy it as I need the money for a gynaecological underpinning for my frail, elderly mother who is 96 and can’t have children.

Praise for my Miss Hope’s Chocolate Box;
‘I must say you are rather good at the writing lark, I haven’t laughed so much since Anthony Worrell-Thompson had to close his restaurants,’ Bob Barnett

‘I have never made Griddle scones in my life,’ Miss Hope’s Mum.

There is a typo on page 58,’ A man in my office who should know better.

‘Don’t you think he is chubby enough?’ Mr Greenwood’s doctor.

So, if you fancy slipping into something more comfortable, like a sugar coma, this is the book for you.

Au reservoir,
Miss Hope

Have a look at the beautiful photos taken in our Dulwich store from stunning Children’s Fashion brand Alex and Alexa.

www.alexandalexa.com

The hire our stores please conatct www.lightlocations.co.uk

Miss Hope in her Dulwich home Photo: PAUL GROVER

‘This house, in Dulwich, felt right from the very start. Light floods in from the back and fills the whole house; it puts its arms around you and gives you a cuddle.

My son is an avid drummer and a drama student, and there’s always a troupe rehearsing upstairs; thankfully the third floor contains the noise! The dining room is a lively place where all the children and grandchildren gather for special occasions. We play parlour games and, of course, there’s lots of afternoon tea. My rule is that everything should be half the size, but you should eat twice as much.

We have a large, eclectic collection of objects, so we keep to a neutral paint palette: Farrow & Ball’s White Tie on walls and String on the floor. I don’t believe in buying things to “go with” what’s in your house. If you like something it finds a way of living with the other things you like.

Painting; I’m not big on photographs, so we had our wedding portrait painted instead, by an artist called Jenny Jones. We got married at the Chelsea Register Office, and all the guests wore Hawaiian dress.

 Table; This is one of the first things Mr G and I bought together, when we were skint. We found it in Cornwall, and I remember we both withdrew £50 from the cashpoint to buy it. Its war wounds include a pool of chocolate from the shoot for my book – I can’t get it off. The bonbon dish came from a junk shop in Lyme Regis – I have a huge collection of them.

Shop sign; My husband’s background is in antiques, and we love trawling about for unusual things. Quite often, they find us! This old sign for Bert’s pie and mash shop came from an auction and, unbelievably, it’s from the very shop where my husband used to go as a boy.

Tea set; My husband looks a bit like an owl and my first name is Kitty so together we’re the owl and the pussycat. We stayed on a farm on our honeymoon and the owner served tea in a set covered with owls and cats. We tracked down the artist, Emily Jones, and she made a set for us as our wedding present to each other. You can also see a yellow teapot that I bought in Le Touquet, and my mother’s favourite coffee pot .

Wooden decoration ;This crazy thing came from a Bonhams auction. It was originally from a fairground. I just love it. I style the pictures for my books, so all my props come in handy.’

‘Miss Hope’s Chocolate Box’, by Hope & Greenwood (£12.99; Ebury) is published on March 3; www.hopeandgreenwood.co.uk

This weekend I made Hugh’s Shoulder of Pork, ‘Donny Brassco.’

It’s Sunday evening and my family are ready to chow down. Liberal aromas of a Pig Matterhorn; star anise, root ginger, fennel seeds and cinnamon waft graciously round my vestibule.

Pork, ‘Donny Brassco,’ gets its name because you can ‘fugeddaboutit’ while it cooks for a juice- dribbling 24 hours.

I have breasts and thus have no idea who Donny Brassco is, not a clue. However I can tell you that eating a lump of pig, larger than Elvis in the super-size-me burger years, is a piggly experience which I recommend highly.

Once the dishes are done and the drains unblocked with a ruler I am flopped on my sofa, fecund with porkiness, belly straining against an elasticised waistband levee, chewing on a bit of crackling.

Salt is on the telly box and Angelina Jolie is running about being thin, yes damn her, thin.

‘I bet Angelina doesn’t flob-out on the sofa eating pork.’ I observe, wisely.

‘Oh yes she does,’ says Mr G, ‘but only if Brad asks her very nicely.’